Why is getting clarity important? One of the things I get asked most often is: “How do I know what is right for me to do?” The answer isn’t simple because relationships are complicated, difficult relationships are more complicated, and being a Christian in a difficult relationship is even more complicated because you also want to consider what God wants you to do and what the Bible says about what you should do.

There is no single answer for what you should do in any situation, unless it is a clear mandate from God such as not committing adultery, murder, stealing, or bearing false witness. There are many biblical principles that need to be considered including caring for yourself, standing up for what is right, taking a stand against evil, speaking the truth, giving to others, letting others be responsible for themselves, being kind, compassionate, and forgiving, and setting boundaries. These need to be applied in a way that fits the unique issues in your relationship.

“Clarity” means to have clear thinking. There are many times that our thinking isn’t clear in difficult relationships and our job is to work through the muddled thoughts. You can’t make this happen in a moment. It will take time and growth on your part, but you will eventually get clear thinking if you are open to it and searching for it. Here are the components of clarity:

• You will have realistic expectations.
• You will accept the situation as it is.
• You will be willing to see all sides of the issue truthfully.
• You will have a balanced view of your part and the other person’s part.
• You will feel emotionally stable and confident, and know you are standing in your truth.
• You will have a plan for how to deal with the problem based on biblical and practical principles for difficult relationships applied in a way that takes the unique factors in your relationship into consideration.

Clarity comes as you commit yourself to seeking it. It sometimes comes slowly and other times abruptly. But it will eventually come.

By Karla Downing

Relationship Devotional Prayer

 
God,

Give me a clear understanding of your truths as they apply to my relationships. Direct my thinking so that I will know what is good, right, and pleasing to you. Help me be patient as I work through the components on my way to getting clarity.

Relationship Devotional Challenge

• Identify a situation in a relationship that you are confused about.
• Review the six components of getting clarity. Identify the components that you need to work on.
• Accept that it will take time for you to get clarity, so commit yourself to working on it.
• Ask God to give you clarity by showing you what is good, right and pleasing to him.

Scripture Meditation

 
Romans 12:2

“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing, and perfect will” (NIV).