Perseverance is a godly characteristic that is sometimes misapplied in our difficult relationships.

One of the verses that is frequently misunderstood is First Corinthians 13:7, “Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” This verse is applied to difficult relationships encouraging a person to “hang in there” and passively hope things will get better, trust that things will work out, protect the other person from bad things, and persevere no matter what occurs. But, what if it means that love protects what is good and wholesome, trusts God to take care of you even if you have to set scary boundaries, hopes for what is in the long-term best interest of both people, and perseveres for what is right rather than tolerates what is wrong? It would be applied very differently then.

Here are some comments from people who have lived this verse with the two different interpretations:

I lived the first description because I believed it, but it turned into a doormat mentality with enabling, rescuing, placating, and appeasing and still nothing changed until I turned to loving healthily with boundaries.

Love also acknowledges, admits, and tells the truth [or the ‘reality right in front of you,’ as it is defined by the Greek lexicon]. Love courageously sets a boundary (scary though it may be) in the face of injustice, unfairness, mistreatment, and abuse—whether it is spiritual, emotional, mental, or physical. In light of this verse, I was sometimes made to believe that giving in, placating, acquiescing was the most loving thing to do. I now believe that the second meaning of the verse as written above is the most loving and godly way to interpret it. (Joan C. Webb, author, speaker and life coach)

I persevered by gritting my teeth and bearing whatever was thrown my way. I thought I was doing the right thing, but I know now that I only prolonged the pain for everyone involved. Real love takes a stand for what is right.

What are you persevering for? Persevere for what is good, righteous, and right, not the status quo. Draw a line between what is wholesome and harmful. Hold on to what is in the long-term best interest of you, the other person, and the relationship. Your perseverance should clearly be a light shining into darkness with the hope that the darkness will disappear.

By Karla Downing

Relationship Devotional Prayer

 
God,

Help me to persevere for what is good, righteous, and right. Give me the courage to shine light into darkness by the lines I draw in my relationships.

Relationship Devotional Challenge

•  What are you persevering for?

Scripture Meditation

 
2 Peter 1:5-9

“For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But whoever does not have them is nearsighted and blind, forgetting that they have been cleansed from their past sins” (NIV).